Seasons of Sorrow
Judith Barrington, the award-winning author of Writing the Memoir, offers this advice to writers dealing with difficult subjects: "The voice must have authority. But more than that, I must know that the writer is all right." (p. 71)
Author, pastor, and blogger Tim Challies earned the sad distinction of being an authority on tragic loss following the sudden and unexpected death of his only son, Nick, in 2020. Beginning soon after the tragedy and continuing throughout the painful first year, Challies chronicled his experience in a book of essays titled Seasons of Loss. And despite writing the book while his pain was so fresh and raw, Challies does prove to be "all right." And he attributes that fact to the abiding, good, and constant love of God, in whom the author placed his trust long before that brutal year of mourning.
Too often, as Christians, we tend to share our challenges only after we have had time to process them and experience some recovery. Undoubtedly, writing about pain from a greater distance can have certain advantages – like helping new grievers see how the passage of time aids healing. But time can also immunize us from the memories of the early days of loss, washing away some of the unfiltered, authentic thoughts and feelings Christians may experience in the trenches of grief. Looking back on a valley after passing through it is very different from being in it. There can be value in our witness when people see us process loss in light of our faith in real-time.
The Bible contains many examples of such immediate responses to suffering, like in the Psalms, and I appreciate that Challies took this approach. In authentically sharing how he dealt with doubts, concerns, and questions in those early days, he gives a beautiful example of how it looks to love and experience God in life's lowest moments.
Seasons of Sorrow, therefore, is not just a journal of one Christian's travels through a dark valley; it's a guide for fellow travelers. And whether the reader's loss is recent or long past, the insight Challies offers is valuable. Through specific examples, such as an unexpected interaction with a couple at his son's grave, he invites us to see how a Christian can know God's love, goodness, peace, and provision more fully through suffering.
Grief often surprises us in painful, unexpected ways. Challies points out many of these that he endured, but he doesn't leave us there. Instead, he shares what brought him a measure of healing in those moments. For example, the pain of no longer being able to demonstrate his love tangibly to Nick led him to this comforting truth: "But the reality is that there is nothing Nick needs…because he is in that place where all his needs have been met." (p. 168) In this way, Challies repeatedly points readers to the hope and meaning found in God's saving, eternal love. Hearing these truths, held fast by someone so immersed in terrible loss, carries power.
In Seasons of Sorrow, Tim Challies has invited us into a very private chapter of his life, vulnerably sharing his grief to show us how it looks to navigate loss while trusting God to deliver through it. More than anything, his story points toward the only source of true healing in the pain of death. His generosity in sharing this excruciating chapter in his life will shine light in the early days of loss for many, not just parents grieving children but anyone who needs an example of walking in the light of God's love during the darkest times.
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Barrington, Judith. (1997, 2002). Writing the Memoir: From Truth to Art. Portland, Oregon: The Eighth Mountain Press.
Challies, Tim. (2022). Seasons of Sorrow: The Pain of Loss and the Comfort of God. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan.